so, this is a long story altogether that i’m going to attempt to condense and “bullet point” as much as possible. that said i’m still just typing it up as a standalone webpage here because anywhere else i post it it’s just going to be a wall of text.
when i moved to san francisco in 2014 i was in the midst of an ongoing relationship with a very problematic person whom over the years i have come to realize is a sociopath at best, likely narcissistic / borderline personality disorders. this person, while being manipulative enough to keep me stuck in said relationship for probably longer than i should have been - on top of the fact that we had a kid together - was ongoing and perpetually extremely abusive. physical violence towards me and adjacent. towards the kid. psychological and emotional abuse. financial abuse. rape. you name it she did it, and typically on an ongoing basis to one extent or another always shifting her abuse / manipulation patterns when one option ran its course. after ending things with her i found some wikihow article on “how to spot a sociopath” and she basically did all the controlling things that article listed in the order they were listed from physical stuff to being controlling of time to finances etc.
due to her chaos and her rigidity in other areas allowing for no other option, i became basically a stay-at-home parent to our kid while she worked and didn’t allow for anything else to feasibly happen. i was just biding my time hoping something would change.
this ended in 2016 when she had an atypically significant psychotic episode (as opposed to the other still-but-not-as-severe psychotic episodes she had routinely over the years prior) and abducted the kid.
after trying to peacefully resolve the situation she sent another crazy alcoholic friend of her’s to beat me up. i realized i’d just be force to go to court. i went to court, eventually got an attorney, and long-story-extremely-short spent the next several years after this in perpetual financial recovery mode from where she’d left me while also being forced to piecemeal freelance around my kid time (which ended up being 50% for far longer than it should have because her abuse towards him the half of the time he was with her, including sexual abuse, not to mention emotional and psychological - just persisted and i did everything i could to just parallel parent against it) while basically waiting for california law to mandate that he had to go to school, cause his mom didn’t want him in school and always refused to comply with any attempts at preschool etc. on my part as well.
after a few years when he finally was of 1st grade age, when those laws kicked in, i was able to finally enroll him in school and get sole decision making over his education in court after his mom told a judge he didn’t want him to be educated.
as such i was finally able to do something more than freelance around his schedule and managed to get full-time employment again for the first time in years.
then the fucking covid mess happened. the nonprofit i was working at rapidly lost revenue as a result, and had to lay me off.
the years since have been basically 4 more layoffs and zero part-time work as the job market has been entirely fucking bizarre and stupid, to say the least. i’ve never had this much trouble finding steady work.
additionally, the kid’s mom who somehow still hung onto him way more than she should have given everything, even though i technically had him a slight majority of the time most of the year at this point, had another relapse of some sort in march of 2025 and abducted him again. tried to kidnap him out of state. a bunch of other crap.
had to get a new attorney (previous one retired) and the rest has been more tediously slow legal process (the court system around family law, even in san francisco where it’s objectively better than the rest of the state and country, is abysmally slow and terrible - it certainly becomes illustrative of how rampant child abuse is in this country and how it’s just allowed to persist as much as it does. legal powers seemingly all but do everything they can to avoid it and not do dick about it unless they’re basically forced to and they drag their feet forever) of working with the court system, my family law attorney, and now a reconciliation therapist to get my son to snap out of a year+ of brainwashing at the hands of his psychotic mother and get him back to me majority / hopefully full-time without the court needing to further intervene otherwise (which his mom might end up giving them no choice but we don’t go back to court in september so we’ll see what the therapist i’m working with can do between now and then and how much his mom complies given the other way this ends could just be her in jail)
ok so ALL THAT out of the way, as mentioned i’ve had 4 fucking layoffs since 2020. i’m presently looking for work but nothing’s stuck. i need to network more locally and i’m trying. the apartment building where i live is landlorded by a non-local who’s an absolute asshole shithead who is also prejudiced against me. given what my ongoing financial circumstances have been, and having tried to go to court against them with a housing attorney as well, i’m basically in an emergency on top of an emergency on top of an emergency right now. i’ve been given an ultimatum that if i can’t pay rent by july 1st (next month) i’m evicted and i likely won’t have the ability for much recourse, even though the building i live in has multiple ongoing code violations, another tenant who is also prejudiced against me and at one point a year and a half ago literally came over to my apartment when he was on one and punched me in the face, and today at present i am forced to sit at home til 3pm because the asshole dipshit owner put a random “abandonment of property” notice on my door a few days back that i now have to fucking sit at home way more than i want to today on the off-chance they show up (i sent them a sternly worded email saying they know i’m not abandoning shit and they can’t just arbitrarily assert that i am when they feel like it) so i can, in fact, be present and show them that i’m here, which they already know i am. but anyway.
needless to say i need a lot of help and i don’t even fucking know where to find it at this point, hence posting all of this. whether some sort of immediate work leads in creative or creative adjacent fields (as a single parent i obviously can’t afford to just take ‘any joob’ but i am flexible within my primary career path and open to a lot right now needless to say) or just a fucking safe place to stay in the city (there are no publicly funded options available anymore for someone like me in this regard thanks to the fucking breed administration gutting all the spending for those programs and lurie thus far refusing to do anything to fix it) and / or direct financial help as well as i have around 1 dollar and change in my bank account right now which is pretty routine lately because of all the years of built up bullshit that i really want this to be the year this shit finally just fucking changes.
but it’s becoming clear there’s not much more i can do on my own right now. i wish i could just move to a better apartment but i don’t have the funds til i’m employed needless to say and in the meantime i need to find some fucking way to not be homeless - for me and for my kid - by the literal end of this month.
so anyway this has probably been a disjointed ramble but it’s the best i can do with current frustration / stress levels this morning as i try my best to think of things i can do between now and 3pm that are otherwise productive while i wait to see if one of the landlord’s dipshit lackies shows up regarding their erroneous / harassing “abandonment” notice - they did the same shit to a neighbor of mine when he was on vacation for a few days once and forcibly moved all of his stuff out of his apartment. i hate this fucking place and the horrible owners.
so anyway yeah - income leads, a safe place to stay in the city, and / or financial help are all immediate needs. the rest (insofar as the kid situation goes etc) i’m used to navigating at this point and will continue to do so. and i look forward to tomorrow (tuesday) night as i’m making that gig happen despite all of this.
respond with any capacity you have if you’re able or if you can think of others to pass the word along to and at the very least thanks for reading all of this.